Things You Might Like to Know

It occured to me that I've written a lot about the process here & how I've experienced this whole crazy train but I haven't said all that much about our kids. So here are a few things about them that I thought you might like to know:

Nastia (Anastasia Landyn Sapienza)  -
* She was born December 2, 1999
*We kept her birth name (Anastasia but changed it to the American spelling - and as a side note, it is pronounced differently in English as well) because it is "her". We (I) chose her middle name because I love the name, it is "very American" should she decide to go that route, I can see us calling her by this name (although it would be a challenge to not call her Nastia), it is the name of a childhood friend's daughter who took a strong interest in Nastia & our adoption of her last summer, and it was one of the very few names Richard could settle on. Richard has a hard time changing the kid's names. I totally understand where he is coming from. It is hard to take everything from a child that is familiar to them & start calling them by a different name at the same time. The thing is, I think in the long run they will appreciate having an American name. It's a tough call for parent adopting a foreign child...
*We previously thought Nastia had been in the orphanage for at least four years. Turns out she had only been in the orphanage since February 2010. Yep, just 6 months before we met her! And looking back on our experience with her last summer & where she is now (not to mention the obvious relationship she has with the local inspector - who is very likely the person who has advocated for her for many years while she was in & out of a "shelter" & then finally removed from her "unstable home environment"), things make much  more sense. She went from "I just like to color & play with dolls" (which wasn't even true but was probably what she tought we wanted to hear!) last summer to "I want to be a doctor" yesterday. And while I think she has no idea what it actually takes to be a doctor (what 11 year old does?), I wouldn't have bet a dime on it last summer (when I had concerns that she could not even read) that it was even a posibility. But now, I would not put it past her considering that, in all likelihood, she started attending school regularly only when she entered the orphanage.
*She also likely only started eating regularly when she entered the orphanage. She has been chronically under nourished. She is making up for lost meals!! The kids loves to eat! All foods (except chocolate)! She was an 8-slim last summer. I am not exactly sure what size she is now, but I have a feeling we will need to go shopping when we get home. She is finally "healthy".
*Her only medical diagnosis of concern is scoliosis. If this is accurate, I doubt it is significant enough to need treatment.
*We have asked for an accounting of what exactly lead to her birth mother being deprived of her parental rights. In other words, be more specific than her birth mother had "immoral behavior & an unstable way of life". What was our daughter's experience of this? We would like to know if she was abused vs. neglected. As hard as it would be to hear, I think it would help us to support her emotional development & processing of her past. Sadly, I do not have confidence we will get this information. I do not understand why not... It just seems like this is more than is shared with adopting parents. I know, it make ZERO sense. It is not as if us not knowing makes the whole thing go away... I guess it's a cultural difference.
*Her father died about five years ago. He was 45.
*She has five (we think) older siblings; all of whom are adults and none of whom (at least that we know of for sure) make any effort to contact her.
*She is VERY social & confident. She will make friends easily & will likely loose them just as fast if she doesn't learn to "discriminate in her speaking" (in other words, bite her toungue!).

Henry (Henry Valeriy Sapienza) -
*He was born August 8, 2002
*We chose the name Henry because we both actually liked it (!) & it was Richard's father's middle name. We will likely call him this once we are in America because his Ukrainian name (which we *almost* didn't keep - believe me, it was down to the wire! I didn't know what name, Henry Valeriy or Henry Ashton, was going to be on the piece of paper after my pencil was done writing his name down for our adoptiong facilitator!) really is not translatable to English. Still, we face the "change everything familiar about a kid" issue with him & he seems to be quite sensitive. So...we will likely continue to call himValeriy until it makes sense to call him Henry. Cross your fingers for us on this one. I REALLY want to call him Henry!
*He has been in the orphanage since January 2010. Before three weeks ago, we had never met him so we don't have the comparators that we do with Nastia.
*His birth mother was young & unmarried. His father is unknown. His birth mother was deprived of her parental rights for the same generic reasons as Nastia's. Again, I have asked for specifics...
*He has no siblings.
*He participated in a hosting program last summer in the US but not in North Carolina. We learned of him through our US facilitator who also coordinated the hosting program he participated in. What a blessing that he did not meet his forever family.....yet!
*He is obviously a very smart little guy! He knows how to play chess (which...we...don't) & you can see the wheels just a spinnin' when he is learning something new. He's logical in his thinking. I can parent that!! Or so I think I can...
*He is curious but a good bit reserved. I imagine that he is concerned about failing in front of us or disappointing us (I remember when Nastia had only just met us and seemed to be the same way). It breaks my heart for him because he has no idea how much we only want for him to explore & learn about the world - much of which is by trial & error! Hopefully he will figure this out soon. We are anxious for him to see how accepting we are of his sister.
*He has a medical diagnosis that is genito-urinary in nature & may require a surgery. It is nothing that is lifethreatening or even needs to be addressed immediately.
*He LOVES chocolate & Coca-Cola!!
*We have not observed him with other children. So we do not know how social he is. If he needs a green light to be social, his sister is it!!

Our kids could not be more different from one another! We think they will make perfect siblings in oh-so-many ways!!

Anyway, there you have it. A few facts about our kids... If there's anything you've been wondering about that I didn't speak to, just ask! We want you to know them. They are truly God's children...