I've been holding my breath for so long waiting for a vote by Ukraine parliament on the proposed adoption legislation that you probably forgot I wasn't breathing! I really only have two official sources for updates regarding a vote on the legislation and I've seen no comments or update since the vote was delayed a few weeks ago unitl the next week. My sources do not mention the fist fight by parliament members the following week or anything else for that matter. Silence. Nothing. Not a word. I don't know what to make of it, but it seems fruitless for me to keep holding my breath. In hind sight, maybe it never was fruitful at all. But it just feels like you gotta do *something*!!
Of course, there is one other area of Ukrainian government concern (argh). The ministry (or division of the government) that oversees adoption has been, well, eliminated. Yup. The responsibility essentially now falls under another ministry. Of course, as of yet, nothing has changed. Except that families do not know when they board airplanes to travel to Ukraine and get out of cars to walk up to the SDA building if their appointments will occur as scheduled. And the employees of the "old" ministry do not know, well, you guessed it, anything.
I'm sure there's some "structure" to all that is going on over there but I can assure you I don't know what it is.
In any case, as 2010 concludes, I praise God for a blessed year. I am truly undeserving...
As 2011 commences, I know two things for sure: we will adopt Nastya and Valeriy this year (God please let the in-country process begin in April and end no later than June - yes, they're arbitrary dates at best, but when you have no say in the timing, you feel compelled to make something up so you have *something* to hang on to!) and I'm going to have to find a source of income. Uh-huh, I quit my job. Generally speaking, It is not advisable to quit one job before you've found another and I totally understand the logic behind thais thinking. But "generalities" aren't really my style (if you've known me for years - or even just a few months, this will not be a news flash!). And while it seems as though I may have rocked the boat or complicated my current situation which is already "out of the ordinary", please trust me on this one. Granted, I'm not thrilled with not having a job (actually, at this point I could care less about not having a job; it's not having an income that concerns me), I have complete peace about leaving my most recent job. I have made the right decision for my family and me.
No doubt 2011 will be the biggest year of my life yet. I pray the same is true for Nastya and Valeriy. I've said it before but it bears repeating, being adopted is bitter sweet for children. And many times the bitter is so strong the sweet cannot be detected. I hear over and over how lucky they are that we are adopting them. I know what you mean and I do agree; they are lucky that we are adopting them. But in the big picture of life, my kids are far from lucky. We can only ask for God's guidance and wisdom as we lead them to healing and happiness. It's a tall order but we are blessed to be sharing the task with other adopting families and our family and friends. Your support means everything! Thank you! And Happy New Year!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
A Sigh of Relief with More Breath Holding to Follow
Hi All,
In case you were worried about the safety and security of our legal documents, I'm pleased to report that are effectively in the hands of our Ukrainian adoption facilitator! Thank you, Judy & Walt!!
With that little sigh of relief, we move on to holding our breaths & praying in anticipation of tomorrow's scheduled vote on the pending legislation that could have unknown implications to our adoption. Best case scenerio, the legislation will not pass but we'll settle for more delays!
Our thoughts & prayers are with the many families currently in and outside the US adopting children. I dare say there are two things an orphan child dreams of hearing: #1-you are part of family & (for international orphan children) #2-welcome to America!! Godspeed to all of the families who have included a child's dream as part of their dream. Tis the season for miracles!!
God bless,
Andrea
In case you were worried about the safety and security of our legal documents, I'm pleased to report that are effectively in the hands of our Ukrainian adoption facilitator! Thank you, Judy & Walt!!
With that little sigh of relief, we move on to holding our breaths & praying in anticipation of tomorrow's scheduled vote on the pending legislation that could have unknown implications to our adoption. Best case scenerio, the legislation will not pass but we'll settle for more delays!
Our thoughts & prayers are with the many families currently in and outside the US adopting children. I dare say there are two things an orphan child dreams of hearing: #1-you are part of family & (for international orphan children) #2-welcome to America!! Godspeed to all of the families who have included a child's dream as part of their dream. Tis the season for miracles!!
God bless,
Andrea
Friday, December 17, 2010
Small but Significant Milestone
Real quickly, I wanted to share that yesterday we compiled our complete dossiers (one for each kid) and placed them in the hands of another family who is traveling to Ukraine this weekend and they will place them in the hands of our facilitator who has power of attorney to file the documents with the Ukraine State Department of Adoption on our behalf (after they are translated & apostilled in Ukraine). Trust me when I say one sentence about these documents and the work it took to complete them does NOT do it justice!! In fact, I had quite the emotional attachment to my "overly organized" file and had difficulty parting with it. In all fairness to me, I had less time to "love on" the complete file than I was counting on (we had picked up the last apostilled documents from the Secretary of State's office only a few hours earlier). So saying goodbye to it felt too rushed! That said, we were fortunate to have transferred responsibility for them to a family that knows first-hand how much we value these documents! We know we have passed the love torch for our documents on to them which makes me feel much better than extinguishing the torch at my local FedEx (and for an exorbitant fee, no less!). I am duly pleased and slept well last night....
Thank you, Judy & Walt. Godspeed in your trip to Ukraine and hugs & kisses for Yarik!!
Thank you, Judy & Walt. Godspeed in your trip to Ukraine and hugs & kisses for Yarik!!
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
An Actual "Target Date"!!
Hi All,
We just received news that our homestudy was registered with the Ukraine SDA today. Even though they are closed for the holidays, they are accepting homestudies and issuing dossier submission dates. Thus means that in mid-February, our facilitator will submit our dossiers for consideration and within a few weeks the SDA will invite us to meet with them. Typically the meeting date is a few weeks from the date they issue the invitation. So this is in keeping with our previously adjusted April timeframe to travel to Ukraine.
The next obvious question is "when will we return home with the kids?". Our situation is complex (not that everyone's isn't for a variety of reasons!) because we are adopting two children in different orphanages in completely different regions of the country. In other words, the only things their adoptions have in common is that they will both take place in Ukraine and they will both end up with the same parents! Otherwise, the whole "in country" experience is likely to be a BIG puzzle!! And the parts may not reveals themselves up front. We are thankful to have THE BEST TEAM we could ask for and we are entrusting the details to them.
Typically speaking, uncomplicated (haha) adoptions of a single child take three to four weeks for court approval of the adoption followed by a ten-day waiting period (during which most families return to the US) and then another ten days to two weeks (only one parents is required for this part) to wrap up Ukrainian & US paperwork. Optimistically, we can add two weeks to the initial three to four weeks to get court approval for both adoptions (obviously this will require some creative "weaving" of activities). We will not likely have the ten-day "down time" which means we will not returns home until ALL IS SAID AND DONE! And while this might not seem ideal at first glance, I'm not the strongest of closers. I do my best work right out of the gates and before I come up for air. So returning the the US for a "break" could put "round two" in Ukraine at risk!! :) So I'll consider it a good thing that I won't be traveling twice. But the reality is we will likely be in Ukraine for eight weeks (and thats an optimistic guestimate!). So, without firm dates or a calendar in hand, my best guess is that we will return home with out children in mid-June. Wow...it almost feels real. But still a long ways off...
Still looming is the proposed legislation that was due to go to a second vote but did not make the agenda and has been delayed until next week. It's hard to draw any real conclusions about what that means. This truly is the dark cloud that casts a shadow on our dreams that are finally taking shape. What I know for sure is that God brought the four of us together and He will see this through. If our plan doesn't look like His plan...well then, shame on us for planning!!
Real quickly, I'd like to thank the many families who have gone before us for sharing your journeys and being my window to the future. Your blogs are truly God's way of preparing me for what would have most certainly otherwise been a disaster. In fact, I "practiced" today for my trip to Ukraine. I went to a large Asia market with scary looking food and where no one could help me even if they wanted to!! Of course, I realize that the fact that I wasn't there to get my children made the whole experience feel falsely secure (well, that and I was in Cary, NC!) but you gotta start somewhere!!
Anyway, I wanted to share our bit of good news!!!
Merry Christmas to all!
We just received news that our homestudy was registered with the Ukraine SDA today. Even though they are closed for the holidays, they are accepting homestudies and issuing dossier submission dates. Thus means that in mid-February, our facilitator will submit our dossiers for consideration and within a few weeks the SDA will invite us to meet with them. Typically the meeting date is a few weeks from the date they issue the invitation. So this is in keeping with our previously adjusted April timeframe to travel to Ukraine.
The next obvious question is "when will we return home with the kids?". Our situation is complex (not that everyone's isn't for a variety of reasons!) because we are adopting two children in different orphanages in completely different regions of the country. In other words, the only things their adoptions have in common is that they will both take place in Ukraine and they will both end up with the same parents! Otherwise, the whole "in country" experience is likely to be a BIG puzzle!! And the parts may not reveals themselves up front. We are thankful to have THE BEST TEAM we could ask for and we are entrusting the details to them.
Typically speaking, uncomplicated (haha) adoptions of a single child take three to four weeks for court approval of the adoption followed by a ten-day waiting period (during which most families return to the US) and then another ten days to two weeks (only one parents is required for this part) to wrap up Ukrainian & US paperwork. Optimistically, we can add two weeks to the initial three to four weeks to get court approval for both adoptions (obviously this will require some creative "weaving" of activities). We will not likely have the ten-day "down time" which means we will not returns home until ALL IS SAID AND DONE! And while this might not seem ideal at first glance, I'm not the strongest of closers. I do my best work right out of the gates and before I come up for air. So returning the the US for a "break" could put "round two" in Ukraine at risk!! :) So I'll consider it a good thing that I won't be traveling twice. But the reality is we will likely be in Ukraine for eight weeks (and thats an optimistic guestimate!). So, without firm dates or a calendar in hand, my best guess is that we will return home with out children in mid-June. Wow...it almost feels real. But still a long ways off...
Still looming is the proposed legislation that was due to go to a second vote but did not make the agenda and has been delayed until next week. It's hard to draw any real conclusions about what that means. This truly is the dark cloud that casts a shadow on our dreams that are finally taking shape. What I know for sure is that God brought the four of us together and He will see this through. If our plan doesn't look like His plan...well then, shame on us for planning!!
Real quickly, I'd like to thank the many families who have gone before us for sharing your journeys and being my window to the future. Your blogs are truly God's way of preparing me for what would have most certainly otherwise been a disaster. In fact, I "practiced" today for my trip to Ukraine. I went to a large Asia market with scary looking food and where no one could help me even if they wanted to!! Of course, I realize that the fact that I wasn't there to get my children made the whole experience feel falsely secure (well, that and I was in Cary, NC!) but you gotta start somewhere!!
Anyway, I wanted to share our bit of good news!!!
Merry Christmas to all!
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Paper Chase Nearly Conquered!
Despite the delays in our travel to Ukraine to start the adoption proceedings (which we have determined, due to our unique situation, could not have been foreseen and avoided), all the other pieces to the puzzle continue to fall into place and God continues to reveal His plan. As a result of having to drop everything for an unexpected paper chase to get a document to a family in Pennsylvania who is traveling this Sunday (tomorrow!), we have been blessed to now be in contact with the family adopting Dema, Valeriy's best friend from the summer hosting program. I had heard about Valeriy's friendship with Dema and am thrilled to have connected with Dema's family. Not only did they have wonderful things to say about Valeriy (which only solidifies God's plan that Valeriy be part of our family as there is no other explanation for how he was not matched with a family this summer), they too are interested in reuniting the boys (they are not in the same orphanage) very soon! After some suggestion that because they have family in our area they may consider a trip here, I learned they are organic farmers and I promptly invited myself to live with (I mean, visit) them!
Yesterday, we received in the mail our I-171H which is the US Homelamd Security approval to bring adopted Ukrainian children into the US. This is "the final" document needed for our packet to submit to Ukraine. Due to the change in timelines, I thought that receiving this document would be somewhat anticlimactic, but I was wrong. It actually felt VERY SATISFYING! We are by no means "done" with our paperwork. More papers need to be notarized and then apostilled, but the key is that we are now "in charge" and are no longer waiting for something for someone else [That's probably a completely ignorant statement. But let's go with it for now...]
A few more thoughts about the pending legislation that could significantly impact and delay our adoptions: we are not deterred. We are disappointed, but have no inclination to change our course. We will do whatever it takes... Our prayers are for the children who, every day they live in an orphanage without a family, are robbed of a part of their soul. You can say they are kids and are simply "living in the moment" and, therefore, are not affected by a delay in being adopted, but if I were you, I wouldn't say that to me... However, if you truly believe that, I'd be happy to take 30 seconds to correct your thinking. And that's all I'm gonna say about that.
Thank you to everyone who has expressed your concern for us (and our kids) during this time. Indeed, we are living under a bit of a cloud for now. We will let you know as we learn more about the situation. At this time, it is my understanding that the second vote will be December 15. After which, the president would have to approve of the change in legislation as well. It is impossible to know how quickly results would be felt.
In any case, I will close with this: if you haven't already, check out this link: http://betheanswerforchildren.wordpress.com/2010/11/19/update-ukraine/
The information is nothing new but notice the google advertisement at the bottom. THIS WILL NOT be our girl.... I have no words for how this breaks my heart but the fact is this is the ABSOLUTE BEST our orphan girls can hope for if they are not adopted into a loving family. It's not an easy pill to swallow, but it's the truth...
Much love to all! We feel you lifting us up in your hearts and in your prayers!
Yesterday, we received in the mail our I-171H which is the US Homelamd Security approval to bring adopted Ukrainian children into the US. This is "the final" document needed for our packet to submit to Ukraine. Due to the change in timelines, I thought that receiving this document would be somewhat anticlimactic, but I was wrong. It actually felt VERY SATISFYING! We are by no means "done" with our paperwork. More papers need to be notarized and then apostilled, but the key is that we are now "in charge" and are no longer waiting for something for someone else [That's probably a completely ignorant statement. But let's go with it for now...]
A few more thoughts about the pending legislation that could significantly impact and delay our adoptions: we are not deterred. We are disappointed, but have no inclination to change our course. We will do whatever it takes... Our prayers are for the children who, every day they live in an orphanage without a family, are robbed of a part of their soul. You can say they are kids and are simply "living in the moment" and, therefore, are not affected by a delay in being adopted, but if I were you, I wouldn't say that to me... However, if you truly believe that, I'd be happy to take 30 seconds to correct your thinking. And that's all I'm gonna say about that.
Thank you to everyone who has expressed your concern for us (and our kids) during this time. Indeed, we are living under a bit of a cloud for now. We will let you know as we learn more about the situation. At this time, it is my understanding that the second vote will be December 15. After which, the president would have to approve of the change in legislation as well. It is impossible to know how quickly results would be felt.
In any case, I will close with this: if you haven't already, check out this link: http://betheanswerforchildren.wordpress.com/2010/11/19/update-ukraine/
The information is nothing new but notice the google advertisement at the bottom. THIS WILL NOT be our girl.... I have no words for how this breaks my heart but the fact is this is the ABSOLUTE BEST our orphan girls can hope for if they are not adopted into a loving family. It's not an easy pill to swallow, but it's the truth...
Much love to all! We feel you lifting us up in your hearts and in your prayers!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Today is Nastya's Birthday
Today is Nastya's 11th birthday. This will be her last birthday that does not get celebrated with excessive fanfare!! Never again will this day pass uncelebrated!
Unfortunately, today was met with bad news :(. We awoke to news from our facilitator that, well, to make a long story short, by the end of the day, we came to understand that we will not be traveling to Ukraine to begin the adoption proceedings for our kids in February. Or March.
It's not a surprise that the Ukraine State Department of Adoption basically "closes" for some time over the next month or so, but however it came to be, we grossly miscalculated the potential impact to us. In all fairness, there are many balls in the air. And, believe it or not, because we are adopting kids that are not yet available for international adoption, submitting too early was a risk also! Then throw in the fact that Ukraine is not necessarily "predictable". Anyway, all the balls that were up in the air came crashing to the ground for us today.
And then the clerk at the Secretary of State office was mean to me today. I wish I could say that making me cry made her feel bad, but I honestly think she was quite pleased with herself. I have a special prayer in mind for her tonight. Don't worry; I'll be (as) NICE (as I can)!
As if the delay is not distressing enough, we have serious concern that Ukraine may pass a law that could potentially put all adoptions on hold for an indeterminate amount of time. Of course, this is way worse than a two month delay! But, we are powerless to affect this and in the words of our facilitator, "What are you going to do; stop (your adoption proceedings) and wait (for an outcome)?". Ummmm...NO!! So we press on thru the tears and disappointments.
What causes us the most sadness in knowing our kids are living family-less in an orphanage when we so desperately want them home with us. In Vova's (paraphrased) words, no matter how nice an orphanage is and no matter how good your caregivers are to you and no matter how many friends you have, the orphanage is not the same as a family. (I can't wait to meet that kid! His Dad left today to start the US paperwork to bring him home!)
For now, I try desperately to keep the faith!! Minute-by-minute, it’s so hard to appreciate that it’s all part of a bigger plan. And it’s easy to forget how far God has brought us already.
Ok. So I’ll end on an upbeat note: IT WILL NOT BE WINTER WHEN I GO TO UKRAINE! You see, God knows I am not weather-hardy!!!
Blessing to all & thank you for your ongoing support and prayers. We (or I should say “I”) need it!!
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Should Have Known Better
There is not much to report in terms of our adoption of Nastya. We’re a bit sad that we have not heard from her but we are hopeful we will have a phone call with her and receive a letter from her very soon! We will, of course, share this with you!!
Our paperwork is progressing without issue. We have just been "invited" by US Immigrations to be fingerprinted in order to be cleared to adopt children internationally. Notice the word "children", as in "pleural". Yes, as in “more than one”. Our placement assessment approved us for three children – which is NOT (and never has been) the plan! However, it was the plan to adopt two, so I should have known better than to title this blog “Nastya’s Adoption”.
We’ve identified a boy who is 8-years-old who participated in a hosting program just like Nastya did when she stayed with us this summer only he went to Pennsylvania and by God’s design, ended up not being matched with a family. The family that hosted him had LOTS to say about him, but here’s the takehome: “I really just fell in love with him throughout the week and meeting him absolutely changed my outlook on life! I am sure that you will feel the same if you get to meet him! He is so full of energy, but there is a real sweetness to him too and his blue eyes can just melt you!”
Our paperwork is progressing without issue. We have just been "invited" by US Immigrations to be fingerprinted in order to be cleared to adopt children internationally. Notice the word "children", as in "pleural". Yes, as in “more than one”. Our placement assessment approved us for three children – which is NOT (and never has been) the plan! However, it was the plan to adopt two, so I should have known better than to title this blog “Nastya’s Adoption”.
We’ve identified a boy who is 8-years-old who participated in a hosting program just like Nastya did when she stayed with us this summer only he went to Pennsylvania and by God’s design, ended up not being matched with a family. The family that hosted him had LOTS to say about him, but here’s the takehome: “I really just fell in love with him throughout the week and meeting him absolutely changed my outlook on life! I am sure that you will feel the same if you get to meet him! He is so full of energy, but there is a real sweetness to him too and his blue eyes can just melt you!”
We are blessed to have the opportunity to get to know him a little bit through a family that spent significant time with him; but just like when we were faced with hosting Nastya, we had already decided we would adopt him NO MATTER WHAT!
So we need your prayers on this one! We will write to him this week and introduce ourselves. And we will follow up the first letter or two with a phone call to his orphanage (he’s not in the same orphanage as Nastya – more on that in a minute) to talk with him. Adoption to another country is scary for kids. Adoption by someone you don’t know has to be terrifying. The reality is both of our kids got a bad deal thus far in life and we pray that God brings them peace as we become a family!
A few details that might be of interest…
· His name: We’ll call him “V” for now. As we progress in a relationship with him, know him better, and have more confidence in our adoption of him, we’ll divulge more specifics.
· Where he is: In an orphanage in Ukraine. He’s not in the same orphanage or even the same region as Nastya. He is about 8-9 hours by car away.
· How this changes things: Other than the obvious (adding an 8yo boy to our “to adopt” list & to our family), we’ll be in Ukraine a bit longer (we hope no more than two weeks) longer & our time there will be more complicated with travel back and forth to the different regions and Kiev. We think our initial travel to Ukraine to start the "in country" adoption process will only be delayed by a few weeks at the most. Nastya will be available for international adoption “sometime” in February and V is not available for international adoption until early March.
One more thing…we’ve been asked by many people if we will change their names (give them American names). We have no judgment for those who chose to do this but our feeling is that we do not want our children to feel as though *anything* about who they are, where they came from, what they’ve experienced, and, yes, even those they love is not important and perfectly ok with us. We fell in love with them even though they have names we do not relate to & I am have no doubt that you will too!!!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
The Beginning (Of Sorts)
I probably should have started this blog a while back because now I am quite behind in "the story". So let's see if I can catch you up in an instant. How it came to be that Richard & I are adopting a beautiful, sweet, funny, & bright 10-year-old little girl who lives in an orphanage in the Ukraine is nothing short of a miracle. The odds were against us finding ourselves where we are today, but none-the-less, here we are! Just goes to show you that with God all things are possible - which brings me to the present time. After having had our precious girl with us for 3 weeks, she returned to the Ukraine & we got busy navigating thru the process of adoption - which brings me back to "with God all things are possible". After almost a month, we are seeing light at the end of the paperwork tunnel. Our homestudy is complete & we only await a document that was not required to be part of the homestudy until just a few days ago (go figure...) and we are ticking off the list of dossier documents.
To be as specific as we can be, it is our goal to travel to the Ukraine in February to begin the "formal" process of adopting and hope to bring Nastya home in either March or April. We'll keep you posted along the way.......
To be as specific as we can be, it is our goal to travel to the Ukraine in February to begin the "formal" process of adopting and hope to bring Nastya home in either March or April. We'll keep you posted along the way.......
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